Heart Of The Dragon

Heart Of The Dragon
February 10 2015

Years ago my father posted to his bulletin board a mimeographed (you remember those) cartoon of a big scary dragon sitting and picking it’s teeth with a knight’s sword. The knight was gone (eaten) with his knightly paraphernalia scattered around. The dragon smugly picked his teeth with the knight’s sword, his belly bulging. The caption read, “Sometimes, the dragon wins.”

I was ten. I wasn’t sure what to make of the cartoon and what it was saying about fairy tales and life, but I had a hunch there was more. This pre-dated Far Side and Calvin and Bloom County and Get Fuzzy. We were poised for a cartoon … Continue reading »

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Goodbye Marianne

Goodbye Marianne
February 2, 2015

Something is strange in my belly.
It’s changing.
The things and people I protected
for my own survival
is morphing
in my belly –
like a beast that’s been alive
yet sleeping for ages, lifetimes.

But I know the best lives now,
and it’s time for the rest to go.

I can no longer hide
from my power.
I have to claim the beast
and the power within.

That means I’ll be sacrificing
the sacred cows —
the me that always protected others
for the sake of getting by.
For the sake of only surviving.

But I don’t want to just survive.
I don’t want to always worry about just surviving.
I want to thrive.
And to thrive… Continue reading »

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Stage Hermit

Stage Hermit
January 28, 2015

In large groups, I’d rather blend in. Sit back. Even disappear. Watch. Observe. Notice without being noticed. Slip through.

I’m a regular high sensitive introvert — sociable if you meet me in person or in very small groups, but quiet in crowds.

But something strange happens when someone gives me the microphone and puts me on stage. I’m not shy. I come alive. The bells of my soul ring. The whistles of heart sound. Something stirs. Deep. It all comes alive in front of the crowd. It wails through like a soft, joyous storm that can’t go without saying, that can’t go without being seen. This is the inspirational joy of my heart coming alive and singing with … Continue reading »

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Friday Night Date Night

Friday Night Date Night
January 26, 2015

Friday night date night — a thirty dollar down home Italian dinner with a shared cheap glass of white wine in a small western cow town. We reveled in how good it was to be out in the big city. The vital side booths were filled and we took our table for two in the middle while waitresses and food and guests swirled around, glittering in the late Christmas tinsel and lights.

Friday night date night, holding hands while we walked with the gritty swoosh of unrefined highway traffic and semis swooping by, swooning and laughing that Walmart was our excitement for the night.

Friday night date night, pausing at Walmart’s doors where the cosmic mystery … Continue reading »

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Hoar Frost

Hoar Frost
January 8, 2015

I left the trundling bundles of Western Slope SUV’s and trucks yesterday, to join the steady slipstream of BMW’s and Audis license-plated “MR2SEXY” breezing through the precious canyon between Nederland and Boulder. Spirit guided me to avoid the I70 and I25 interchanges through Denver and take the back way because “they wanted me to see something.”

This vague message keyed me into awareness when I realized I was where they wanted me to see this important thing. What? And there it was. The trees, ghostly, hovering in hoar frost so thick I thought of the beards of Yukon men drizzling and tangled with frozen ice.

This was not a hoar frost laid down the night before. No, this … Continue reading »

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Travel Dreams

Travel Dreams
January 5, 2015

My mother has always inhabited my travel dreams, inhibiting the places I wanted to go. She’s perpetually blocked exotic destinations and adventures as I packed my bags and attempted to board buses and trains and planes. She’s always impeded me as I tried to fold and organize clothing in suitcases, when all I wanted to do was move and grow and change. (Travel dreams can be the harbinger of deep growth and change.)

Her presence and the travel dreams have frequently reached a sizzling presence in my night space, and even my day space, when my life teeters at the edge of unknown but fortuitous change.

The reason I mention this is that my travel dreams returned in … Continue reading »

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